Taylor Swift Is Annoying and Pharrell’s Hat Can Talk: Aka Grammy Fashion.

Was it just me or were the Grammy’s kind of a yawn fest this year? Watching it, I felt like the whole thing was really low energy (except for Kendrick Lamar + Imagine Dragons, which is AMAZING), and since when is Macklemore and Ryan Lewis considered “New Artists”!?

If there was one thing (actually 2 things) that I learned from last nights award’s it’s that Taylor Swift is the most annoying person in the world (STOP jumping up and dancing for every song) and that Pharrell’s hat probably had the best view during the show since it was about 1 foot taller than everyone else. He’s usually very cool and I LOL-ed at his accessory, Vivienne Westwood or not.

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That being said, here is my brief and honest fashion re-cap…

There’s a lot of buzz (some how people found it “inappropriate“, but they’re probably pretty prude) around Beyonce + Jay Z’s duet/intro. Albeit I was bored through the whole thing, there is NO denying that they are pretty effing amazing!!! Like is Beyonce’s body real life?! Is their love even real life!? Omg #powercouple!!! I wish I was Blue Ivy.

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This Michael Costello gown was made for Bey and I’m still obsessing over her body.

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On the subject of the #powercouple: John Legend and wife Chrissy Teigen are another gorgeous couple who I find it impossible to look away from. John Legend’s music is as sexy as him and his wife basically just a goddess. Her gold Johanna Johnson gown was so unbelievably stunning! She looked a like a gorgeous Queen Mermaid and her simple make up and hair balanced out all the glamour she exudes. A+! (Metallics are super hot for spring, FYI!)

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Giuliana Rancic is an accomplished member of the Fashion Police team, so she is obligated to look great at any major event. Last night was no exception! While not being much of a fashion risk, the Alex Perry gown was perfectly understated and beautiful; after all, she came as a guest and not as a star. Sometimes, simple is okay.

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Kelly Osbourne (another Fashion Police favorite) also rocked the cape trend in a Badgley Mischka frock. It was cool and I see where she was going with it buttttttt there was something missing. Maybe it was too baggy? Maybe the cape blocked her curvalicious figure? Maybe the bottom could have been more form fitting? The beading and her hair was perfectly glam meets rock though! Plus if you know me, you know I’m all about full finger rings.

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So if I see Taylor Swift in a champagne beaded gown one more time—actually if I see Taylor Swift ever again—I might scream. I’m just over her people. She’s a 9 year old trapped in a woman’s body and her “omg I can’t believe you picked me” attitude is getting super old. I support Kanye’s speech interception. This is not fashion related, I’m just venting. The gown was sparkly, but boring.

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Katy Perry’s gown was nothing like her mint colored, boob centerpiece gown from last year’s Grammy’s but it was still kind of cool in a quirky, K.P. kind of way. I’m a lover of sheet music so I liked that detail of it. It was interesting, and even though it was see-through, I liked that she replaced showcasing her boobs. It was like see-through in a fashiony-good kind of way.

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Holy Daft Punk. Not only are they just a couple of SERIOUSLY sick dudes, they bring it every time they make a red carpet appearance. Their suits are always impeccably tailored and full of class and they’re just the perfect amount of mysteriously sexy. Is that so weird, since the only pic I’ve seen of them sans mask is from 1991?? Random Access Memories was definitely a work of art and can they please go on a tour soon?? Overall: Perfection. *P.s. please scope their sparkle boots, a la Harry Styles. Killer. 

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Now Wiz Khalifa and Amber Rose are pretty regular fashion killas, so I was glad to see they continued their successful fashion streak. Amber’s gown was pretty, but nothing special (which again, is okay! Better than looking like a hot mess!), but since becoming a mom, she’s really upped her game and coming out looking like a class act! I did notice that Yeezy’s ex-squeeze covered up her tats again. Looks like someone is regretting her ink. (Could have told you that would happen.)… Wiz on the other hand is just SO cool (tats and all)! One of the best of the night. I’m really feeling that Tom Ford on him!

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Ariana Grande: You’re really pretty, but you’re also 22 years old! You’ve got to ditch dressing like a 12 year old! Also, panty hose!?? With those pumps!?? Not even D&G could help you. The good news: she probably has many more red carpet events in the future to redeem herself.

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Madonna is Madonna, so she deserves a quick mention. Not the biggest fan of this Ralph Lauren look, but like I said: it’s Madonna and it works. I dig the flared pant though. I also loved that her son was her date!

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Okay is Ciara even pregnant!? She looks amazing and this dress is surprisingly very flattering for a pregnant woman!

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Right sooo I have no idea who this, but what the FUCK is she wearing!???!! WHO allowed her to be their date!? Did she even look in the mirror before she left?? I’m not one to be offended by other’s fashion choices but this is just absurd. Clearly this person is visiting us from 1991. And even then, I’m not sure this “gown” would be okay.

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Kevin Hart looked GREAT (YSL, I believe)! And girlfriend, Eniko Parrish, looked gorgeous but her outfit was the biggest snooze fest of the night. Is this the Grammy’s or a power lunch?

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Last but not least….

Me attending the Grammy’s in 2001 with my dad, in all of my 2000’s glory (hence my 2 buns and velvet maxi skirt/mock turtleneck combo). This was a few hours before I met Nsync backstage and nearly fainted while getting Lance Bass’ autograph (the picture clearly showed my panic, but I’ve refrained from sharing it here).

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Taylor Swift Is Annoying and Pharrell’s Hat Can Talk: Aka Grammy Fashion.

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